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Just like women with traits of BPD, these men seem to share similar character traits.
And these traits can influence them not only to fall in love with a woman with traits of BPD, but also to remain emotionally attached to her long after he should have left the relationship and sometimes long after the relationship has ended.
But because the idealization phase of BPD relationships creates the illusion that he is with a kindred spirit, the nice guy will naturally assume she is as trustworthy as he is, causing him to throw caution to the wind.
And by the time she transitions out of her idealization phase and into her devaluation phase, he is usually deeply in love with her.
The nice-guy type is a somewhat common cluster of personality traits that is present in both men and women.
This cluster is very beneficial to those that possess it, particularly in regard to their romantic relationships.
And it is the nice-guy type’s mistaken assumption that deep down the woman with traits of BPD is really just like him that keeps him from recognizing her limitations as a relationship partner.
We’ll begin out exploration of the nice guy-type by addressing what differentiates the nice-guy type from the rest of the population.People with this cluster of traits seem to have a natural aptitude for interpersonal communication.They also have a natural aptitude for closeness and intimacy.He must learn that although the woman with traits of BPD may closely resemble a nice-girl type, the motivations behind her behavior are quite different.But it may take more than education about traits of BPD to convince a nice-guy that the love of his life was not who he thought she was.